So it’s now August 28, 2017. Ania and Ryan are laying in bed watching his new favorite, “Transformers Generation”. I am here updating my Footprint for the first time in a while. Wanted to catch you up on where I’m at.
I can honestly say I am doing much better than I was. Ania has been making great strides towards improving herself and how she makes me feel. She helps a lot more around the house now, seems to appreciate the things I do a lot more, and seems genuinely committed towards making this work. We still have our bad days. Days when she wants more answers. Days when she cries. Days when she questions my commitment and loyalty. But we are doing much better than we were.
We did a lot of things together throughout the summer. We laughed, we cuddled, and I felt like we were finally a ‘team’ the entire time. We went to the Jersey beach a few days ago and while looking out to the water while they played and splashed each other, I felt like a weight was lifted. Like the darkness was gone. Like I had a clear mind for the first time in a while, and like I was where I’m supposed to be.
I remain cautiously optimistic about our future. I don’t know what lies ahead, but I am blown away at how far we’ve come in a relatively short time. This is not where I pictured us being. I lost all faith in our marriage and felt like I was destined to be alone. But I can’t tell you how many times over the summer I thanked my angels and said to myself “I feel like I’m where I am supposed to be.” I was finding my inner happy again, and I even laughed sometimes.
All in all…a GREAT summer. Her and I are doing what we can for each other and I remain committed to making her feel those butterflies she once felt about me. I deserve her, and she deserves me. We deserve each other, and we can be that power couple once again if we try hard enough.
Can love conquer all? We’ll see.